All these little sins

Every single day in 2024, I asked for forgiveness 1,000 times and it has transformed me.

One of the wisest pieces of advice I’ve received was, ‘Never underestimate the power of a good apology.’ Saying ‘I’m sorry’ can sometimes be the only way to mend a relationship, acknowledge your faults, and make a promise to do better. But even the most forgiving and patient person you know has their limits. Not Allah though. Allah’s mercy prevails over His wrath and many other attributes. In fact, the word mercy appears in the Qur’an approximately 348 times, with many of His names reflecting His forgiving nature. Even so, this is just one part of His rahm (mercy); He has saved the remaining 99 parts for the Day of Judgement, where we will need it in abundance. Subhanallah.

We Muslims are a flawed people. While we have the most merciful Lord, it is imperative that we seek His forgiveness perpetually. Not only is it good for us in the Hereafter, but istighfar—seeking Allah’s forgiveness—is also the answer to all goodness on earth.

Over a year ago, I began doing daily istighfar. This happened around the time I was heartbroken over a man who did not want to marry me. I found solace in this daily ritual. It would take me six or seven minutes to say, ‘Astaghfirullah’—I seek forgiveness from Allah—every day. Initially, I did it almost absent-mindedly, but the more I persisted, the more intentional I became. After some months, I wanted to graduate to a lengthier form of istighfar, so I switched to saying, ‘Astaghfirullaha wa atoobu ilayh’ (I seek Allah’s forgiveness and I repent to Him).

My tasbeeh has 100 beads, so I recite my istighfar in ten sets, making a total of 1,000 repetitions. This takes me 30 minutes—40 if I recite it slower. The Prophet (peace be upon him), who was in a constant state of istighfar, did a minimum of 100 repetitions each day. This is a totally achievable number. You can start with 100—or even 10. Be intentional. With each rotation around my tasbeeh, I ask forgiveness for different things: my anger, giving in to my nafs, sins against my parents, siblings, and friends, exposing myself, self-admiration, pride, ego, riba (usury), riya (showing off), and for the sins of my limbs, speech, thoughts, and actions. Later, I will ask for forgiveness for the pride I feel in sharing a post like this (my intention is to make istighfar accessible to you, not to show off my piety).

I began doing daily istighfar around the time I had been heartbroken over a man who did not want to marry me. I found solace in this daily ritual.

I fit istighfar into my day, always carrying a tasbeeh or relying on my fingers if I forget. I recommend having a separate device for istighfar; not only do they serve as physical reminders, but they may also act as a form of dawah. I’ve been approached by Muslims on the street as I performed dhikr. On one occasion, a woman in a mosque handed me a tasbeeh when I forgot mine (where you have the intention, Allah always provides—alhamdulillah). Over the past year, I’ve been gifted tasbeehs that I’ve used repeatedly until the beads ripped off their threads and scattered on the streets. The beautiful thing is, the person who facilitated the act of worship by gifting me the tasbeeh will also reap the rewards. Alhamdulillah.

Istifghar is the most win-win act of worship you could do. Not only are you in constant repentance, you are also facilitating the acceptance of your duaas.

I often do my istighfar while travelling—to the gym, coming home from work, or in transit. It’s a great use of time and also keeps me from listening to music. Istighfar has led me away from some sins I once loved. Alhamdulillah and Astaghfirullah. There have been days I avoided a sin because I didn’t want it to become tomorrow’s istighfar. Equally, though, I’ve done istighfar on the way to sinning. May Allah forgive me.

Istighfar is the ultimate win-win act of worship. Not only are you in constant repentance, but you are also paving the way for your duas to be accepted. Istighfar, coupled with sending salutations upon our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him), is the best way to have your prayers answered. Since I began istighfar, I’ve seen some of my most persistent anxieties—like joblessness—disappear. Not only was that burden lifted, but I was also given a job beyond anything I could have imagined. Our Lord provides from sources we never thought possible, and such blessings often begin with istighfar.

Istighfar doesn’t have to be laborious. It can even be incorporated into salah. Following the sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him), say ‘Astaghfirullah’ three times immediately after completing your fard prayer. Between sujood, say, ‘Allahumma ighfirlee, warhamnee, wahdinee, wa’afinee, warzuqnee’ (O Allah, forgive me, have mercy on me, guide me, grant me good health, and provide for me). However, I encourage dedicating a specific portion of the day solely for istighfar.

Make tawbah an automatic response on your tongue—after a sin, when you think of a sin, after a good deed, or when someone praises you, as only Allah knows our deficiencies. Definitely do it when you feel stress. Our Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Whoever is consistent in seeking Allah’s forgiveness, Allah will appoint for him a way out of every distress, relief from every anxiety, and provision from sources he could never imagine.”

Start small—100 repetitions a day saying ‘Astaghfirullah.’ Replace times you listen to music with time for istighfar. Once it becomes a daily habit, you can increase the amount or diversify your vocabulary of repentance. More often than not, I say, ‘Astaghfirullaha wa atoobu ilayh’. You can also say, ‘Rabbigh firlee’ (My Lord, forgive me). There are lengthier forms beloved to Allah, including the one below, narrated to wipe out one’s sins if recited in the morning or evening.

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The Best duaa for seeking forgiveness, sayyidul istighfar:

Allahumma anta rabbi la ilaha illa anta, khalaqtani wa ana abduka, wa ana ala ahdika wa wa’dika mastata’tu. A’udhu bika min sharri ma sana’tu, abu’u laka bini’matika ‘alayya, wa abu’u bidhanbi faghfirli fa-innahu la yaghfiru adh-dhunuba illa anta.

(O Allah, You are my Lord. None has the right to be worshiped but You. You created me and I am your servant. I am committed to Your covenant and promise, as much as I can. I seek refuge with You from the evil I have done. I acknowledge all the blessings You have bestowed upon me, and I confess to You all my sins. So, forgive me, for indeed, no one forgives sins but You.)

The one above is quite a lengthy one which may take a while to memorise. There are shorter alternatives including:

Astagfirullah (I seek Allah’s forgiveness)

Astagfirullaha wa atoobu ilayh (I seek Allah’s forgiveness and I repent towards him)

Astaghfir ullah-alladhi la ilaha illa Huwal-Haiyul-Qayyumu, wa atoobu ilaihi (I seek the forgiveness of Allah, there is no true god except Allah, the Ever-Living, the Self-Subsisting, and I turn to Him in repentance)

May Allah accept our forgiveness and have mercy on us. Ameen.